Team Notes and Weekly Recaps

Green

Green Named 2003 Team MVP: Cereal Kilurz General Manager Mark Petrillo named Ahman Green the 2003 Cereal Kilurz MVP today.  Green had a spectacular year, leading the team in fantasy points (207) and earning a team high seven game balls.  His best week of the season was Week 17 (during the EFFL optional pool) when he scored 22 fantasy points, rushing for 218 yards and two TDs.  One of his scores was 98 yards, the second longest TD run in NFL history.  Green scored less than 10 fantasy points on only four occasions this year and averaged nearly 13 points per game.  Green was signed for $29 at the 2003 EFFL auction, making him a very likely carryover player for next year.

Brooks earning his first game ball

Playoffs, Round 2: Had the Cereal Kilurz scored one half of a point more last week, they would have won the EFFL Super Bowl this week and finished the season with a 13 and 3 record.  Instead, the Kilurz were crushed by the Rebel Yell 103.5-69 and finished the season with and 11-5 record.  "Hell yes, I'm disappointed," quipped Head Coach Mark Petrillo after the game.  "We dominated the division this year.  We prepared for the playoffs.  And we literally came up one yard short of winning the whole thing."  Ahman Green (12) and Keenan McCardell (12) each had more than 120 yards and found the end zone this week, and the Dolphins defense (16) had their best game of the year, but the final game ball of the 2003 season was given to Aaron Brooks (15), who had nearly 300 passing yards and threw two TD passes.

Gonzalez snagged two more TD passes

Playoffs, Round 1: In a game that came down to the wire, the Cereal Kilurz were edged out by the Shipyard Sharks, 89-88.5.  The Kilurz 88.5 points would have been enough to beat any of the other playoff teams, but unfortunately was not enough to stop the wild card winning Sharks.  Petrillo started all the correct players this week, but it just wasn't quite enough.  Just how close were the Kilurz to reaching next week's EFFL Championship game?  If any of the following happened, the team would have won: one more yard for Keenan McCardell (2), three more yards for Reggie Wayne (2), one more sack for the Vikings defense (.5), four more passing yards for Aaron Brooks (28), five more rushing yards for Ahman Green (15), or even 1 less yard for the Sharks' Tory Holt (11).  "I'm not only proud of what this team did this week, but of what they've done all year long," commented Coach Mark Petrillo after the game.  I'm not going to lie to you though," he continued, "this week's loss was absolutely heartbreaking."  Ahman Green added two TDs to his season total this week, but he wasn't a serious consideration for this week's game ball.  And even though Aaron Brooks (28) scored more points, Petrillo honored Tony Gonzalez (21) with the weekly award.  Gonzalez posted 93 yards receiving and caught 2 TD passes.  Petrillo said, "Aaron had a great game, yes, but don't forget the fact that he threw four of his five TDs to Joe Horn (30)."  Horn plays for the Sharks.

Green earning his seventh game ball

Week 14: With a 46.5-43 win over the Second Half Slide, the Cereal Kilurz finished the 2003 season with an EFFL best 11-3 record.  The Kilurz will face the Shipyard Sharks in Round 1 of the Playoffs next week.  The Kilurz beat the Sharks in Week 11 and are 5-1 against the team lifetime.  "The Sharks have a pretty solid team," commented Head Coach Mark Petrillo, "but I'm confident we'll beat them and advance to the championship game."  The Kilurz 46.5 points this week was their lowest total since Week 1, but it was enough to hold off the Slide.  David Akers (10) scored double digit points for the third consecutive week, but once again, this week's game ball went to Ahman Green (10).  Green rushed for 80 yards and a TD, earning his seventh game ball of the season.

Gonzalez hauled in two TDs

Week 13: The Cereal Kilurz won their tenth game of the year this week, defeating the SuperJets 57.5-50.  With only one game left to play in the regular season, the Kilurz 10-3 record is tops in the EFFL.  "I'm really proud of these guys," stated Head Coach Mark Petrillo.  "This has been a great season, and I'm really looking forward to the playoffs."  Petrillo benched Aaron Brooks (19) and David Akers (14) in favor of Tommy Maddox (9) and John Carney (6) this week, but starting the Dolphins' Defense (15.5) over the Vikings (-2.5) made up for the mistake.  Tony Gonzalez (14) caught two TDs and was awarded with his second game ball in the past three weeks.

The Vikings Defense put up big numbers

Week 12: For the third time in a row, and only the fourth time in 12 meetings, the Cereal Kilurz were defeated by Matt Saylor's Kodiak Bears.  Unlike previous losses, this game wasn't even close, as the Bears won by a score of 81-35.  Head Coach Mark Petrillo was nonchalant discussing the game.  "We've already locked the division.  Sure, winning out would be nice for bragging rights, but I told the guys to take it easy and save their A games for the playoffs in a few weeks."  Petrillo made a poor decision in benching David Akers (17) in favor of John Carney (2) this week, and he also should have started Tiki Barber (3) over Moe Williams (3).  The 35 points the team scored this week was their lowest total since Week 1.  Ahman Green (7) made a bid for yet another game ball, rushing for 154 yards, but because he failed to find the end zone for only the second time this year, Petrillo gave the weekly honor to the the Vikings Defense (14).  The Vikings had four interceptions and returned two of them for TDs.

Gonzalez has been consistent all year long

Week 11: In a meaningless game for the playoff bound Cereal Kilurz, the team did their part to keep the EFFL Wild Card race interesting by defeating the Shipyard Sharks, 61.5-57.5.  Kilurz General Manager Mark Petrillo has been so impressed with Ahman Green (11) this year that he went to see him play in person against Tampa Bay on Sunday.  Green was limited by leg cramps, but still managed to rush for 109 yards and a TD.  "The guy is just awesome," remarked Petrillo.  When questioned about the possibility of carrying Green into the 2004 season for $34, Petrillo replied, "Ahman is the heart and soul of this team.  I think there's a really good chance you'll be seeing him in a Cereal Kilurz uniform next year."  Petrillo poorly chose to start Terry Glenn (0) over Tampa Bay's Keenan McCardell (8), who was listed as Questionable with a hamstring injury, but it didn't affect the outcome of the game.  Neither did starting Aaron Brooks (1) over Tommy Maddox (9) or the Viking's Defense (5.5) over Miami's (9.5).  Tiki Barber (12) had 131 total yards and scored a TD, but this week's game ball went to TE Tony Gonzalez (14).  Gonzalez leads all TEs in scoring with 88 fantasy points, and has scored six TDs in his last six games.

Green is the obvious favorite to be named Team MVP

Week 10: With a five game lead in their division and only four left to play, the Cereal Kilurz clinched a playoff spot this week, beating Pandora's Box 68-44.5.  "This is awesome!" shouted General Manager Mark Petrillo in a champagne soaked locker room during the post-game celebration.  "I knew this team was good, but to have the division clinched in Week 10, well, that's just amazing."  TE Tony Gonzalez (13) and WR Keenan McCardell (11) scored TDs for the Kilurz once again, and RB Moe Williams (20) had a huge game from the tam's bench.  QB Tommy Maddux (18) had a brilliant debut for the team, just four days after being acquired from the Rambling Gophs.  For the sixth time this season, the weekly game ball went to RB Ahman Green (20), who rushed for a team record 192 yards and scored twice.  Green now has 13 TDs on the year and has found the end zone in all but one of the game's he's played in.  He's scored less than 14 points in a game only twice this season.

Maddox

11/6/03 Trade: The Cereal Kilurz traded TE Freddie Jones to the Rambling Gophs in exchange for QB Tommy Maddox today.  "Freddie filled in nicely for us last week," commented General Manager Mark Petrillo, "but honestly, with Tony (Gonzalez) past his bye now, we just don't need him any more.  What we need is someone who can not only fill in for Brooksie this week, but someone who can back him up down the stretch as well.  And I believe Tommy is the man to do just that."  With Aaron Brooks on bye and Maddux facing the Arizona Cardinals, the QB will likely make his first start for the Kilurz this weekend.

Green the Machine

Week 9: It came down to the final play of the Monday night game, but the Cereal Kilurz managed to edge the Water Boys 60-59.  With wins over both of the EFFL's 2003 expansion teams, the Kilurz have now beat every active EFFL team during the regular season, except for the Red Zone Assassins (0-4).  With five games left to play, the Kilurz have a four game lead in the Lambert Division and are all but a lock to make the playoffs.  "It's so nice to be back to our winning ways," said Head Coach Mark Petrillo.  "Last year (when the Kilurz went 5-9) was such a mess.  I'm really looking forward to getting my trophies back," he added with a smile.  Keenan McCardell (9) and Freddie Jones (9) each scored TDs for the Kilurz this week, and David Akers (12) may have saved himself from getting dropped after finally putting up some decent numbers, but once again, this week's game ball went to Ahman Green (14).  Green had 189 yards from scrimmage and found the end zone for the 11th time this year.

Brooks

10/29/03 Trade: The Cereal Kilurz sent RB Troy Hambrick to the Badville Chaunceys today in exchange for QB Aaron Brooks and RB Moe Williams.  "This was a great move for us," commented General Manager Mark Petrillo.  "We've been weak at the QB position all year, and now we finally have a legitimate starter.  Not only that, but I was getting sick of having to decide between Troy and Tiki (Barber) week after week, so now that's no longer a problem."  Petrillo started the wrong RB along side Ahman Green three times this year.  Petrillo continued, "On top of all that, Moe Williams' salary is only $1.  You gotta love that."

Wayne earning his second game ball

Week 8: The Cereal Kilurz winning streak was halted at six games this week, after a 67-58.5 loss to the Red Zone Assassins.  "I don't know what it is about those Red Asses," groaned Head Coach Mark Petrillo, "but we just can't seem to beat them."  The Kilurz are now 0-4 against the Assassins in regular season play, but did outscore them 100-31 in the 2001 EFFL Super Bowl.  This week's game was actually close until late Monday night, when Ladainian Tomlinson (13) scored a TD for the Assassins.  Had Petrillo not made a last minute switch from the Dolphins defense (11) to the Vikings (.5), the Kilurz winning streak would have continued.  However, what really broke the Kilurz this week was Arlen Harris (22) scoring three TDs for the Assassins in his first career start.  Ironically, Harris is a Downingtown High School graduate - just like Petrillo.  "It's great to see a fellow Downingtown High School graduate succeeding in the NFL," said Petrillo, "but come on Arlen - THREE TDs?  Sheesh."  Tiki Barber (11) found the end zone this week and Tony Gonzalez (12) scored his fourth TD in his last 5 games, but Reggie Wayne (16) was awarded with this week's game ball.  Wayne had 96 yards receiving and scored two TDs.

Glenn scored 3 TDs in his first start with the Kilurz

Week 7: The Cereal Kilurz won their sixth game in a row this week, defeating the previously 5-1 Rambling Gophs to claim honors as the best team in the EFFL.  The Kilurz now have a three game lead in the Lambert division and barring a terrible string of bad luck, should be all but a lock for the playoffs this year.  "I'm thrilled," commented Head Coach Mark Petrillo after the game.  "Considering how well the Gophs have been playing this year, beating them was huge for us.  We've been a little thin at QB ever since Kurt (Warner) got benched after Week 1, but I'm thrilled with how the other players have been picking up the slack."  Tim Couch (-2) got the starting nod at QB this week and actually earned negative fantasy points.  On top of that, Petrillo started the wrong RB (out of Troy Hambrick and Tiki Barber) for the third week in a row, but he made up for it by signing Terry Glenn (21) as a free agent this week.  Glenn had a huge game, catching three TD passes in the first half and earning himself this week's game ball.  Keenan McCardell (11), also signed as a free agent, found the end zone this week, as did Ahman Green (8), who leads the Kilurz with 10 TDs scored this season.

Green scoring one of his two TDs

Week 6: The Cereal Kilurz shrugged off Derrick Mason's (26) 177 yards and three TDs and went on to beat the Badville Chaunceys 71-64.  Other than the 2003 expansion SuperJets and Water Boys, Mike Shapiro's Chaunceys are the only other team to have never beat the Kilurz in the regular season.  Miami's Defense (15) has finally started playing the way General Manager Mark Petrillo expected them to when he signed them at this year's auction, and Tony Gonzalez (18) appears to have gotten past his early season ankle injury, scoring for the third consecutive week.  But for the fifth week this season, Ahman Green (18) was honored with the game ball.  Green had 190 total yards and scored a pair of TDs, making him the highest scoring running back in the EFFL.  Only the Rebel Yell's Priest Holmes and Jamal Lewis are within 35 fantasy points of Green's league leading 86.

Green carrying the Kilurz yet again

Week 5: Three poor coaching decisions by Head Coach Mark Petrillo cost the Cereal Kilurz 31 points this week, but the team still managed to outscore the entire EFFL while defeating the Strawmakers by a score of 70-55.  "Yeah, breaking 100 would have been sweet," said Petrillo, "but I totally over-coached.  What else can I say?  I started Gus (Frerotte, 14) over Drew (Brees, 20) because he had the hot hand and was playing Atlanta.  I benched Tiki (Barber, 10) in favor of Troy (Hambrick, 2) because Tiki was up against Miami's #1 rush defense and Troy should have run all over Arizona.  And I switched McCardell (16) for Pinkston (1) at the last minute... well... because I'm an idiot."  The Kilurz have won four straight games and now share the best record in the EFFL with the (also Florida based) Rambling Gophs.  Every other team in the EFFL has at least two wins, except for the Strawmakers, who with this week's loss to the Kilurz, are now 0-5.  For the fourth time this season, Ahman Green (17) earned this week's game ball, rushing for 118 yards and two TDs.

Green earning his third game ball

Week 4: The Cereal Kilurz continued their dominance of the Rebel Yell this week, defeating the team for the fifth time in six meetings, by a score of 75.5-60.  The Yell had been undefeated coming into this week's game, and sources say Head Coach Mark Saylor started talking a lot of smack to Kilurz Head Coach Mark Petrillo.  "Yeah, you heard right," commented Petrillo.  "I finally shut him up when I told him to put his money where his mouth is.  So not only did we beat the Rebel Smell this week, but I earned myself five bucks.  Giddyup."  The Kilurz Week 4 pickups both made their presence known in this week's game, with Tim Couch (13) acting as the starting QB for the team and Gus Frerotte (25) having a huge game from the bench.  Troy Hambrick (12) filled in very nicely for Tiki Barber, who was on bye, and Tony Gonzalez (7) scored his first TD of the season.  Despite solid performances all around, there was no question who would receive this week's game ball, as Ahman Green (20) racked up a career high 176 rushing yards and found the end zone twice.  This was Green's third game ball in just four games with the Kilurz.

Reggie Wayne had a huge game

Week 3: "Reggie!  Reggie!  Reggie!"  That was the chant heard form the crowd as the Cereal Kilurz defeated their long time nemesis, the Second Half Slide this week, by a score of 45-35.  "Reggie Freaking Wayne," as Kilurz Coach Mark Petrillo refers to him, had a breakout game, putting up 141 yards, hauling in two touchdown passes, and scoring 19 fantasy points.  Wayne's day not only earned him the first game ball of his career, but it silenced some of the rather harsh criticism he was getting after two poor outings.  "I never doubted the kid," remarked Petrillo.  "I knew he had it in him.  Now he just needs to keep it up."  With this week's win, the Cereal Kilurz moved into a three way tie to lead the Lambert Division.  The Second Half Slide and the Kodiak Bears are also both 2-1.  The SuperJets are 0-3.

Green running away with another game ball

Week 2: The Cereal Kilurz bounced back from a Week 1 loss to defeat the SuperJets (a 2003 EFFL expansion team) by a score of 47.5-33.5  "By no means did we have a spectacular week," stated Coach Mark Petrillo, "but it doesn't take much to beat the SuperJets.  This was an improvement from last week, but we're going to need to improve more if we're going to beat the (Second Half) Slide on Sunday."  With seven wins, Drew Ciesielka's Second Half Slide have defeated the Kilurz more than any other team.  No other active team has won even four games against the Kilurz.  Of note this week: Mark Brunell (8) filled in nicely for the recently benched Kurt Warner and David Akers (6) connected on his first field goal attempt, nailing a 57 yarder.  Eric Moulds (12) had 133 yards and scored, but for the second straight week, the game ball went to Ahman Green (14).  Green rushed for 160 yards, including a 65 yard TD run to start the scoring for the Kilurz.

Green scored two TDs

Week 1: The Cereal Kilurz started the 2003 season with an embarrassing 59-29 loss to the Kodiak Bears.  The Kilurz are 8-3 lifetime against the Bears, but have not won in either of the teams' last two meetings.  "Yeah, I'm disappointed," said Kilurz Head Coach Mark Petrillo after the game.  "But I don't think this Week 1 loss is an indication of things to come.  I mean, Kurt (Warner) fumbled six times, Gonzo was playing hurt, and Akers and Miami combined for 0 points.  0 points!  We'll turn it around."  Petrillo went on to say he was pleased with the performances of his running backs.  "Tiki (Barber) and Ahman (Green) looked great.  We just need to get the rest of the team to step up."  Petrillo awarded the first game ball of 2003 to Ahman Green (15) who had 115 combined yards and rushed for two TDs.

Auction Summary: "I'm thrilled."  That's what Cereal Kilurz General Manager Mark Petrillo said when asked how he though the EFFL auction went this year.  "I think we've got a great team this year," he went on to say.  "I really do.  I think we're definitely one of the top three or four teams in the league, and I'm really looking forward to winning again."  With a starting lineup virtually full of star players, Petrillo might have underestimated his team's potential.  In fact, some would argue that the Cereal Kilurz are going to be the team to beat in 2003.

8/18/03 Press Release: Cereal Kilurz General Manager Mark Petrillo named his 2003 carryover players today.  Petrillo offered one year contract extensions to QB Kurt Warner, TE Tony Gonzalez and RB Tiki Barber.  Critics argue that Petrillo should have also carried RBs Troy Hambrick and Amos Zereoue for $8 and $7 respectively, and WR Amani Toomer for $9, but Petrillo said carrying $43 into the auction was all he wanted to do.  "Don't get me wrong - Those are good prices for those guys... I guarantee they will each go for at least those prices at the auction - But I wanted to have a little more money to spend.  Last year, I built a team with more depth than I've ever had, and it was our worst year ever.  This year, I'm going to go back to what worked for the great Cereal Kilurz teams of the past - a few high priced superstars and less depth.  It's worked for us before, so hopefully it will work for us again."  With these three players locked up, it looks like the Kilurz may very well be on their way.

Warner 1 year - $19		Gonzalez 1 year - $15		Barber 1 year - $9